By Noble Savage:
Picture the scene: you’ve decided to take a year off, and have just managed to get affordable flights to London. Everything is packed and ready, and you just need to get yourself to the airport. Filled with excitement, you get into your Uber, and next stop: the airport. But on the way, you start thinking of everything you’ll be missing in Mzansi….
1. Cheese Curls
I hold a firm belief that world peace can be brought about by Willards’ Cheese Curls (sorry Simba, yours is just not as good). The unmistakeable smell, the fluffiness, the taste – it’s absolute perfection.
2. The Winelands
The perception that South Africa has sub-standard wine is absolute bullshit. European wines might win all the prestigious awards, but I prefer the new-world style of our own wine. And also, FYI, a South African wine receives perfect score from UK wine expert. You know, #justsaying.
This may seem like a weird inclusion on the list, but hear me out: South African banks are world leaders when it comes to early adoption of new technologies. This cutting-edge innovation allows us to use our phones instead of cards, to live virtually cashless, and to be in control of our money. Compared with the UK and US, they still have some ways to go before catching up with us.
4. The Food
Sure, the UK has some of the world’s best chefs and restaurants, but they do not have the vast diversity in culture that particularly influences our food. Everything from traditional to fusion, nothing is off limits. Biltong, bokkoms, biryani, bobotie, braai – the list goes on forever (and those are just the B’s).
5. South African Sense of Humour
As a country, we’ve been through some serious stuff. We’re still going through serious stuff. But we never lose our sense of humour. When the shit hits the fan, it will always be followed by a joke within hours. And Nando’s will inevitably link whatever happened to take-away chicken. It’s who we are, and how we deal with our issues.
Cursing in South Africa, particularly when delivered in Afrikaans, lets you know exactly where you stand with a person. Ordering someone to fok off leaves no need for any interpretation. Similarly, telling someone he’s a tietkop states exactly what you think of him. If someone is built like a baksteen kakhuis, you know precisely the size of said individual. Simple, clear, direct. And let’s not even start with the more colourful language deployed in the Western Cape…
We are all lucky to live in a country as beautifully diverse as South Africa. We might not always like each other very much, and the grass might seem greener on the other side, but in the end this country ultimately entwined in our psyche. And I wouldn’t want it any other way.
What will you miss most about South Africa if you were to relocate to London? Let us know!
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Images used: stock photos